My words have no melody. My melody has no words.

Sacred Music

A birds song, the wind blowing through the trees, rain falling and waves crashing on the shore are the most sacred music of all.

Breathe

Deeply breathe in the present...and thoroughly exhale the past.

Loved or Not

If  love given to you takes a turn towards indifference  there is always an empty place where you carried that love.....the empty place is not where you held your love for them... but  an empty place where you carried the love you thought they had for you.

Love dissolved is  cold, empty.

Nothing to Say

Suppose you decide to see how long you can go without complaining. And suppose everyone started asking  "Why are you so quiet?"

Sometimes it's what is not said that hurts the most.

When you left you took the air around me, for I can hardly breath.

Pulling Files

I put my heart on shuffle to see what I would find.
Amid the celestial flutter were the files of my life and times.
Files labeled "laughter" and "miracles", "strength" and "success". Files  labeled "courage" and  "friendship" and "times I'd been blessed."

Filed under "when my heart was in love"  was only your name
and filed under "rejection" the name was the same.
They had been misfiled so I put them in place,
under " lessons learned from heart ache from suffering and pain."
This file was very heavy so I placed it at the end...and hoped that
I would never find my way back to it again.

The Suitcase

 

I was walking along the road on a cold winter day. The wind was pushing against me as if  to stop me from going any further.. I pulled my coat tight around my neck with my right hand. My left hand was gripping a suitcase that was becoming increasing heavy. I started dragging the case, pulling it with all my strength until I felt broken, like I couldn't go on.. My cold, aching hands released the the heavy burden. Not looking back I turned toward the horizon and began walking.  Left on the side of the road, in the bitter cold,  was the suitcase that carried everything I  desperately held on to.  It was full of hurt, sorrow, anger,  regret, fear, resentment and doubt.  I had to set the suitcase down and walk away. The load had  truly became too much to carry.






  

Not One Step Further

 

She walked down the cold wooden steps towards the dark basement below.
The crackled paint flaked off as she lightly trailed her fingers along the top of the steps railing. Faded shades of green and beige drifting down.  Like tarnished confetti landing on the edge of the steps with the appearance of sorrow as they found there resting place.
She took one slow step at the time.  Each stair step groaning with the sound of tired  wood and rusty nails.
What was unseen in the basements depths seemed to settle upon her cheeks and forehead and  mingle into the fullness of her hair.
She stopped midway...as far as she ever allowed herself to go. The silence was heavy. All she could hear was her breathing. Each released breath lingered somewhere in front of her chest as if it wanted to stay with her and not drift into what was beyond.
The smell  was just as she had remembered from previous times when she had stood at the borderline that she would never allow herself to cross.
It was a warm  amber smell. In some ways comforting,  some ways, familiar.  But at the same time it seemed as if it was making the choice to move forward for her, as if it was pulling her in. There was a stirring of indecision. It made her feel like she wanted what the dark caverns of the basement had to offer but also feared it would be filled with deceit.
She slowly turned and  ascended the stairs. Stepping out of the stairway and feeling the cold brass doorknob beneath her  trembling fingers she secured the door behind her.  She walked away and  heavily carried with her that overwhelming feeling she had learned to live with for so many years. The feeling of wanting something but  letting the fear of sadness or pain stop her from going just one step further.