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| photo by COHolley |
I always got excited about Valentines day.
Each year I had strong faith that I was going to receive a beautiful heart shaped box of candy.
I didn't know anyone that would give me the cherished heart shaped candy box but I imagined it would say "secret admirer". My first memory of having this hopeful heart was in the sixth grade. When the time came to pass out our Valentines to all our class mates my anticipation grew.
There was a pretty blonde haired girl in my class and her desk was stacked high with boxes of candy. My secret admirer was not to be.
But I never gave up hope. I had this same excitement about Valentines day into my late twenties when I received my first heart shaped box from my husband ..and I'm not so sure he would have bought it for me if I wouldn't have humbly said a few days before Valentines " I've never gotten a box of chocolates for Valentines day" It didn't feel like I thought it would. I suppose my subtleties had spoiled the event.
It was sometime in my late 30's that I became jaded about this day of celebrating love. I was single, no love in sight, and I scoffed that it was a day set up by the retailers to make money and I wasn't going to participate.
But now, with life's losses and gains I'd have to say that the two greatest things a person can carry in their heart is love and thanksgiving the greatest of these being love. Thanksgiving day and Valentines day abide in the same place in my heart. They are perfect companions and nurture my soul. The romantic hope of a heart shaped box has been replaced by memories of love lost and gained and both with their own life lessons. The anticipation has been calmed to an acceptance of the joy that is evident.
But, just in case, I should stay home today. You never know when something might be deliverd, labeled " from your secret admirer"
